Story of My Life
by darthslender64
Summary: Most people would think that going to some fantasy world would be the best… not so much when said fantasy world is chalked full monsters bent on killing just about anything with a soul, which, surprise, surprise, includes me. Let's just say that my life on Remnant wasn't exactly peaceful… (SI story, what have I done?)
1. Chapter 1: I Dance With Demon Smokey

**Hello, darthslender here, while this isn't the first story I started it is the first one I've uploaded so constructed criticism is welcome. Also sorry if this feels a little choppy the next update should be better... and longer. so that being said enjoy.**

Soooo most people would think that going to some fantasy world would be the best… not so much when said fantasy world is chalked full monsters bent on killing just about anything with a soul, which, surprise, surprise, includes me. Let's just say that the first few minutes of my time on Remnant weren't exactly peaceful…

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"RAAAWWWRRRR!"

Yaaa that's me, the idiot who decided it would be a good idea to ride a very large, very angry demon bear.

"RAWWRRR!"

"WHAT THE CRAP MAN! THAT WAS MY BUTT YOU WERE GOIN FOR!" I yelled at the thing as it made a swipe that was a little too close for comfort. For the past few minutes I had been tumbling around this things back as it stumbled through the woods trying to dislodge me.

"RAAAAAWWRRRRR!"

But I suppose I should probably explain how I got here huh? Well it started out like an average Saturday. I stayed in bed as long as I could before going downstairs to complete my morning routine and completing some assignments I hadn't done the previous day before going to work for my grandma. Of course the rest of the day pretty much blurred together and next thing I knew I landed on the back of some giant demon bear.

"RAAAAWWWRRR!"

"Eh shut up Smokey I'm trying to get some shut eye up here!" I yelled down at the massive bear like creature surprising myself with my capacity to joke about angry creatures capable of turning me into a midday snack.

"RAAWWRRR!"

Right back to the present. 'How the crap am I still alive,' I thought to me self as I dodged around the massive claws the beast was throwing at me. Somehow I was managing to run around on this things back as it flailed about, crashing into trees, clawing at its back, and generally blundering around trying to get me off. "Man, you could start up some interpretive dance lessons or something," I told the black creature that I had mentally dubbed Demon Smokey.

"RAAAWWWRR!"

"RAAAWWWRRR!"

"RAAWRR!"

'Oh great Smokey called friends,' I thought as I swung around on said monsters back. But, as luck would have it, there was another sound that cut through the forest, a very, very loud noise.

BANG! "EAT DUST ROUNDS YA MOTHER-" BANG!

'The Calvary has arrived I thought dryly as I looked in the general direction of the gunshots, and screams of agony coming from Smokey's friends. Unfortunately for me that meant that I didn't see the massive paw coming towards me.

THWACK! CRACK! THUD! "AAAUUUUUGGGHHHHH!" yup, I got thrown into a tree by a very angry bear monster the size of a minivan. My vision started blurring as I laid with my back against the tree. 'So this is how I die is it?' as the world around me darkened. 'strange, I feel like I should be freaking out, maybe begging for my life or something but I pretty much just feel at peace.' The world seemed to slow down as the giant bear thing approached me. And for the first time I got a good look at the thing. It was a massive expanse of fur blacker than squid ink, the midnight field was broken only by protrusions of white bone, like great rocks and spires among a great field and wow I'm going heavy on the comparisons. As it got closer I noticed the glowing red lines on a bone protrusion that seemed to act as some sort of face mask. As it reared back to deliver the final blow I felt something tugging at the back of my mind. What was it? I knew I there was something that I was forgetting but I simply couldn't remember. As the creatures claws descended I focused past the pained haze gathering around my eyes and looked straight into its red eyes. Just before the blunt claws hit me the creatures head exploded and it was thrown to the side. I struggled to see what happened but try as I might I couldn't muster the energy to move. Just before my eyes closed I saw someone walk up to me I could just make out the shape of what appeared to be a massive sword before unconsciousness overtook me.


	2. Needles, it had to be needles

**A/N hello and welcome to the second chapter of Story Of My Life (name subject to change) I hope you like this chapter and pleas remember to review, constructive criticism is VERY welcome.**

000

I regained consciousness slowly. The first thing I noticed was the pain. There was a dull throbbing making itself known along the entire expanse of my chest and back, over all it felt like I'd been run over by a truck. The next thing I noticed was that I was laying on some sort of bed, the upper half was propped up slightly and I could feel scratchy sheets resting on top of me. After that I turned my attention to my ears. I could hear something beeping next to me but other than that the room was completely silent. I laid there for a few more minutes trying to make out any other sounds but I couldn't hear anything other than the rhythmic beeping. Of course then I noticed that there was some sort of weird perfume or something in the air that was starting to give me a headache. I opened my eyes to figure out what was making the smell, annnnd I'm in a hospital… crap. I examined the room I was in; it was relatively large with few furnishings, there was a chair near the bed and two more in a corner by the door, there was a vase full of flowers, which must've been where the smell was coming from, on a metal bed stand to my left and on my right was some sort of machine with lines going up and down on it (the source of the beeping) along with what looked like a coat hanger that had bags of a clear liquid attached to tubes. I followed the tubes with my eyes until they came to an end, in my wrist. Yaaa, not too fond of needles so you can probably guess my reaction to that. I yelled at the top of my lungs (read screamed like a little girl in a haunted house) and ripped the tube out of my arm as fast as I could. Consequently that also caused the machine next to me to start in one continuous beep as the lines stopped going up and down. 'Oops,' I thought belatedly as I stared dumbly at the machine. At that moment a group of nurses rushed in yelling about defibrillators and a bunch of other medical stuff. Once they saw me they froze in their tracks. "Wassup, mind shutting that thing off?" I asked pointing to the machine that had still not stopped its constant ringing. They just stared at me in shock with their jaws hanging open like fishes. "Oi! Are you gonna shut that thing off or will I have to do it myself," I said snapping them out of their stupor. Immediately the snapped back into action, most of them rushed over to me while one of the older looking ones turned to young nurse and told her to get someone named Ozpin, wait Ozpin? The girl turned and as she ran out I noticed something definitely off, 'a tail? She had a tail? Oh crap I know where this is going,' I thought to myself.

"-ok?" I was snapped out of my miniature heart attack by someone saying something.

"What'd you say?" I asked looking in the general direction of the voice to find the older nurse from earlier looking at me warily.

"I said are you ok?" she reiterated.

"Oh uh umm, ya, it's just that I haven't actually seen someone with a tail in real life before," I said rubbing the back of my head. Her eyes narrowed slightly and I knew that I had messed up. "N-not that I think it's weird or anything, I just never met anyone who has anything like that," I said hurriedly, avoiding the word fanus on purpose just in case. She nodded as if in understanding and moved on to press a few buttons on the machine next to me. Once she got the constant (and annoying) beeping turned off the woman turned to me.

"You should be more careful in the future, you could have seriously damaged your artery when you pulled the needle out," the lady told me reproachfully.

"Well if you could avoid sticking small pointy objects in me in the future I'm sure that would help," I told her, of course I instantly regretted opening my mouth. I never understood that saying about 'if looks could kill,' until now that is, seriously this lady could give a seminar on how to kill people with your eyes. "N-not t-that it's your fault or anything I j-just have a fear of needles," I stuttered shrinking back in the hospital bed.

"I would appreciate it if you would refrain from scaring your patient too much, Flaya," a man's voice said. The voice was calm and smooth and… familiar. I looked in the direction the voice came from and almost crapped my pants.

 **A/N**

 **sorry about the cliff-hanger (not really but whatever) decided that I should probably stop there so i could actually update. once again please review I'm still new to this after all.**


	3. I Dun Goofed

**A/N: I finished this one really fast, surprisingly. And just so ya know I do not own RWBY in any way shape form or how. that being said, enjoy!**

"So let me get this straight, you have no name, family, no friends and no recorded history?"

"No, I have a family, I have friends, and I have a recorded history, my name doesn't matter because I grew up VERY far away from the kingdoms," I had been going over this same question for what seemed like hours.

"Then why don't you tell me your name?" asked the man, he introduced himself as Ozpin, of course I knew exactly who he was the minute I saw him. I mean there aren't very many unnaturally wise looking dude who is constantly followed by a blonde dressed as a librarian with a riding crop. Speaking of… the show did Glynda Goodwitch no justice, that woman wasn't just scary she was downright terrifying. But I digress (that's a really fun word to say just so ya all know), I was sitting there trying to figure out a response when I realized something, 'why am I not telling him? It's not like it matters. I mean sure this feels like some crazy self-insert story but how likely is that? I guess I did just end up in remnant sooo…' THWACK! I was jerked out of my mental musings by the sound of Glynda's riding crop hitting the table, and the sound of my body hitting the floor. The sound made me jump enough that I tipped the chair I had been sitting in backwards spilling me ungracefully onto the floor with a dull thud… and a moan of pain that came out of my mouth.

"-on't see why you needed to do that," I heard Ozpin say. Unfortunately I didn't get to hear the beginning of him chewing the terrifying woman in front of me out over the sound of my pain. I laid on the floor for a few minutes contemplating my situation. I was on remnant, being questioned by a really scary lady who could probably rip me limb from limb with a wave of her hand, a guy who probably already knows that something is off about me, I mean seriously the guy knew _everything_ in the show there's no possible way he doesn't realize that I'm not from one of the little towns outside vale. Not to mention I'm a terrible liar. I tried to get up but only succeeded in putting myself in more pain. "Are you alright?" said unnaturally wise guy asked.

"Fine," I grunted through gritted teeth, "ribs just hurt." The man walked over to me and helped me back into the chair Glynda up righted with her magicky semblance.

"Not surprising considering the beating you took from that Ursa two days ago," the strict woman interjected. Oh ya, fun fact, I was out for two days after demon Smokey bashed me into a tree.

"Speaking of your little incursion in Emerald Forest, how did you end up on the back of an Ursa so close to the school without any evidence of what direction you came from?" asked Ozpin. Of course I knew exactly what he really meant, he wanted to know how I made it into the middle of Emerald Forest without him seeing me on one of those hidden cams he kept out in said forest.

"Now that is an interesting question o great wizard of the Ozluminati, one that I would really like to know the answer of if you ever find out," I told him. As soon as the words left my mouth I saw Ozpins eyes narrow slightly and Glynda almost have a heart attack by the looks of it. "I dun goofed haven't I?" I asked.

"I suppose you could put it that way," the man in front of me said as he took a sip of his coffee. "Now why don't you tell me how you know who I am," he said making it sound more like an order than a request.

"Uh um well…" I started trying to think of something to say. 'What can I say? It's not like he'll believe me if I tell the truth, of course I'm a terrible liar so maybe… whelp when in doubt Mary Stu.' I looked at Ozpin and took a deep breath "at first this isn't gonna make much sense but the more I talk the more you'll understand, or you're just gonna think I'm crazy, but I'm optimistic so…."

 **A/N: Sorry if this is a little short, I'll probably make some longer chapters eventually. also tell me what you think about my first little glimpse of Ozpin and Glynda, please tell me what you think and remember constructive criticism is welcome.**

 **darthslender64 signing out.**


	4. I'm deadpool? what the heck universe

**A/N Annnnd I'm back, although my updates will probably become fewer and further between. I noticed some things that didn't really make sense so I kinda started to address the biggest of my plot holes. if you notice any please tell me, also if you have any ideas on where i should take this don't hesitate to suggest it (unless it involves an M rating) because I'm pretty much just winging it. that being said I know my grammar sucks so any Grammar Nazis out there please help. I know its kinda late and this is getting long but I passed 300 views somewhere back there, is that worthy? eh what the heck THIS, IS, SPARTA!**

 **I don't own RWBY, if I did no one would watch it.**

000

I rolled my shoulders as I walked into the dorm room Ozpin had assigned me. I looked around the room and sighed, 'welp, I guess this will be my home for a while,' I though as I examined the, in my opinion, borderline lavish furnishings, four nicely sized beds ruled most of the room, 'makes sense,' a bookshelf stuffed in a corner, some desks scattered around the room, probably for studying, and a door that probably led to a bathroom. Over all it looked pretty similar to the dorm room assigned to RWBY in the show, before they "decorated" that is. That's right about the time the sheer insanity of my situation hit me, 'I'm in a web show, I just got interrogated by a dude who could've killed me without breaking a sweat, and I'm never gonna see my family again,' I thought. By the last part my knees were weak, I stumbled towards the door that, hopefully, held a bathroom trying to hold back the wave of bile building up in my throat. I burst through the door to reveal that it was, in fact, a bathroom. I spotted the toilet and tripped towards it finally unable to hold back the vomit. I was sick just as I reached the contraption. I knelt there in front of the toilet crying, crying for a family I would never see again. After what seemed like hours of kneeling there, paralyzed by grief I felt myself slipping into unconsciousness, I let the sweet bliss of nothingness overtake me and I forgot, for the moment, all about everything I had been torn away from.

000

(Ozpin's POV)

"-several cracked ribs and two dislocated vertebrae in his lower back, overall he should be paralyzed and in extreme pain, not walking about the school," the woman in front of me said as I took another sip of my coffee. We had been going over the condition of the boy one of my students found in the Emerald Forest. He refused to say his name which struck me as odd, although he seemed to question why he did himself, strange. But if Dr.

000

 _"So much pain… perhaps we should take his pain from him like the others."_

 _"No! If we are to succeed he must know this pain. For if he does not he will share in their fate."_

 _"So be it."_

000

(Ozpin's POV)

"-several cracked ribs and three dislocated vertebrae in his lower back, overall, he should be paralyzed from the waist down. Not to mention the sedatives we gave him seemed to have no effect," Dr. Jadehill finished looking at her data pad. I had called her up a few minutes after I sent Glynda to lead the boy to an extra room in the students' dormitories. He was quite the puzzle as it turned out. He could apparently handle an immense amount of physical trauma and, if he had been telling the truth, was from another universe entirely.

"Hmmm, and you said his aura was dormant?"

"Yes sir, in fact his soul seems to be rooted unnaturally deeply in his body, it is probable that this is why his aura wasn't unlocked during his bout with an Ursa," she replied matter-of-factly.

"Thank you for informing me of this Dr. Jadehill, I'm sure you would like to get back to your patients now."

"Of course headmaster," she replied making her way to the elevator. I turned my chair towards the window of my office as the door closed leaving me to my thoughts.

"This is turning out to be an… interesting year." I said to myself quietly as I took a sip from my mug.

 **A/N... I think I just made myself deadpool, crap, crap, crap. just so you all know I didn't mean to do that. also if you didn't like it please tell me and I might change it if enough people didn't like it. and with that darthslender signing out**


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